bike n vote y'all

 

second line to the polls

projects abound

It’s been a fertile week conversationally. Circumstances and an overflowing psyche forced me to abandon my usually rigorous schedule of writing 2 hours each morning into finding scraps of time when I can. And suddenly creativity abounds, I’m nourishing ideas and projects to keep me busy for actual literal years.

What we found in my great-grandmother’s things, 20 years afterher passing.

A deeper dive into the aftermath of the arson murders at the Up Stairs Lounge. A pal and I attended the fiftieth anniversary last year, and can’t stop talking about it.

Inappropriate therapists. I’ve had ‘em. You’ve had ‘em. I have a lot to sort through.

--the weed guy

--the boring one

--the needy one

--the BFF

And, this series of tweets. Got almost no attention (understandably, as Helene bore down and the VP debate bubbled and fizzled). But it’s on my mind. The ole inside baseball of literary fiction, success for thee (the chosen, the moneyed) but not for me.

I still have a day job, 2 volunteer jobs and a part-time commitment to dog walking for an ailing neighbor. So, more to come.

 

the whelmingness, my heart

It's been a time these past few weeks.

Ugly politics and terrifying weather aside, my heart is full, my heart is breaking, my heart is bursting.

I've traveled thousands of miles, left the country, experienced such joy and sadness.

--Deeper connections to family and friends

--A harsh, shocking schism from a longtime pal I considered family

--A life-threatening illness finally being treated

--Shared laughs, stories, even tears with old pals for the first time in months or years

--Connected creatively and meaningfully, felt heard, felt seen

*

There's a caveat in here.

I haven't settled long enough to feel the joy, the sorrow, the loss.

Deep emotion is scary. Being seen and heard is scary.

Experiencing the end of some relationships, and the deepening of others, is terrifying.

Who was I? Who were we? Who am I now? Can I/it matter?

*

The time will come to feel. Probably. 

All I can do now is write, record, screenshot, listen, watch, wait.

And, yet--

And yet.

new music Friday: Apathy Blanket

Been noodling around with @blyme on making a music video, here is our first cut. "Apathy Blanket."

wowza news (I'm in great company)

 

lmnl nonfiction contest semifinalist #itme

what I'm reading (summer 2024)

When it's hot AF you stay inside and read.

I do, anyway.

Here's a partial list of what I've been reading this summer. A lot of nonfiction and memoir, and some memorable fiction.

• Blood Done Sign My Name by Timothy Tyson
• This reminded me some of Zellner's Wrong Side of Murder Creek, but Tyson writes about growing up the son of a white minister and the murder of Henry Morrow, a Black man in a small Southern town in 1970. The implications of a white church supporting the grieving Black community are deep and painful. I would have been a toddler; history is not that long ago.
   
• Black AF History by Michael Harriot
• As funny and irreverent of a non-whitewashed history of America as you'd expect from this on-air commentator and journalist. I had the pleasure of seeing him speak at Dillard this summer too. I hope he writes a book focused on the hundreds of revolts and uprisings my religious American history books never covered.
   
• Before the Mayflower by Lerone Bennett 
• Harriot's book led me to this gem from 1962. Published before the murder of Martin Luther King, it traces African-American history in what we know as the United States from the earliest days. Hard to find but push your local library.
   
• Know My Name by Chanel Miller
• Miller writes beautifully and powerfully about sexual assault, consent, and the failings of institutions and higher ed. I'm amazed at her poise and vulnerability.
   
• The House of Hidden Meanings by RuPaul
• It's remarkable to me how thoroughly RuPaul Charles has influenced American culture, while somehow dodging the blogs and the culture wars. Ru's memoir is incisive and thoughtful, tracing his early days of making the scene in New York City, shaping and challenging and dropping knowledge bombs. Everybody say love!
   
• Hurdles in the Dark by Elvira Gonzalez
• I enjoyed this memoir even as it frustrated me. A young immigrant woman finds refuge and a future in running and hurdles, but the subtext, the unresolved anxieties of her undocumented family and years of sexual abuse at the hands of a coach, left me wondering and worrying. I hope she is safe and sound.
   
• Come and Get It by Kiley Reid
• I loved Such a Fun Age and this is a stellar follow up. Reid deftly and accurately captures the moods, voices and vices of college students and a professor at the University of Arkansas. You can see the crisis building and you just can't look away. The dialogue is accurate and devastating.
   
• The Bee Sting by Paul Murray
• A layered family story, again with looming crises and hilarious, heart-rendingly bad decisions. The characters are well developed and with the exception of some vernacular dialogue I skipped over, this kept me raptly reading all the way through.
   

video adjacent

Not that anyone's clamoring but I haven't made a video in quite awhile. 

Five years, actually! (Not counting ditch-jumping vids.)

I'd calculated how much time I was spending crafting videos (hours and hours at a stretch) vs writing (less and less). Then, pandemic times. I was taking photos not videos. I forgot about giphy. Who cared, really when Bigger Things Were Happening?

But, recently I've been tinkering with a collaborator. Taking and uploading phone vids. Remembering how fun it is to layer in sounds and transitions and special effects, to speed things up or chop 'em up or slow them down, just to see what happens.

I'm so controlled in so much of my life, but playing is fun.