new missy

New music from Missy Elliott. You know she's my girl. I wasn't sure about Sum1 and visually I didn't care for her part of the video but damn can she sing. The video is fly and sly and fresh too. You could write a master's thesis on her visual imagery. You could = maybe I should.

calibr-8

I'm feeling like a failure and it's not just the raft of rejections for the story I'm sending around (however motivational rejection may be, it's still a "no").
I want to be a better person, writer, sister, aunt, girlfriend, friend, whatever, and against all measuring sticks I feel like I'm coming up way short.
It's been a tough few days for connections.
It's been a time of loneliness and introspection--not unwelcome visitors for the writer, but still.
It's time to assess, re-assess, calibrate.
*
Good things I have done for myself:
Keep on writing.
Video chat with fam.
Cook up a bunch of golden beets and sunchokes and buckwheat soba noodles.
Oh and these raw cookies made of oats and chocolate and almond butter.
30 minutes of restorative yoga for knees and hips and spirit.
The contemplation, however, is nearly, almost too much. 

new art

I put up new art this week by John Malta. Found it at Flatcolor's April art walk. Gosh, this picture makes me happy. I'm running out of wall space but--first world problems, somehow I will go on.
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Uncertainty on so many fronts. I worry that the climate is fucked and as humans, repeatedly and enthusiastically shitting where we eat, so to speak, we kind of deserve whatever is coming. Kids don't, and they're the ones who will be around to clean up our mess. So much violence and hate. I try to balance the news with funny stuff (Broad City, holla!) and creative stuff. Hence the new art, and also because it scratches some itch, apparently. Closer in, I puzzle over a familial relationship that I wish was stronger but just isn't, and I have no idea what to do. The new shrink wants to work on intimacy and intellectually I guess I want to but realistically, no, the walls are working for me just fine, thank.
*
Busysmartypants is making a go of it on Twitter. Lots of cool cats and interesting chats happening there, vs the smarmy brag-fest of facebook. I'm no Twitxpert but I'm feeling my way around. Check me out, say hi, heckle, share, whatever.

todays jam

Mein Gott, how I love this woman.
(And the html width from Youtube to embed the image was 420, hah.)