Don’t be afraid to be confused. Try to remain permanently confused. Anything is possible. Stay open, forever, so open it hurts, and then open up some more, until the day you die, world without end, amen.
George Saunders

Sunday, August 30, 2015


Yesterday I was all set to write about rain and unwatered lawns and the beauty of chaotic vegetation.
Then came a windstorm, power outages, an absence of internet, gashes of rain, and late in the night, desperate times for a good friend.
Today is better only because it is light, and I don't know whether the light can find its way through the darkness coiled around a frail human heart, blanketing and choking out all reason. I have wept and talked and begged and texted and called the authorities and run up friends and wept some more.
If only my buddy knew how many people love them, care about them, enjoy their sarcastic cackle and funny/sad poems and passion for sports and music. I've said it, I've texted it, I've tried to burn it into a fevered brain. But, I'm scared. There are other factors in play, chemical, genealogical.
Now, I'm afraid I can only wait.

Monday, August 24, 2015


I've been thinking about the importance of first lines. A first line that grabs the reader by the lapels and says, "Hey you, I got something you want to hear." I don't even mind the bait-n-switch first lines that end up being  not quite true.
Now is the place in the blog entry where I'm supposed to cut and paste some of the great first lines of literature, but I'm going to resist doing that. It's too easy. And honestly, a lot of first lines aren't that great, either because we've heard them too often: "It was the best of times etc etc.," or, if you haven't read the piece of fiction, the line doesn't mean much to you anyway.
I guess I'm saying it's a matter of personal taste. I'm resolved to think more about it, and do more about it.
c'est tout.

Sunday, August 23, 2015

Sunday, August 16, 2015

he looks good

I've been posting a lot of videos and links lately. It's been a dizzyling busy summer and while yes, I have been writing, I have so little time and energy left for blogging. A friend introduced me to Steve Kardynal videos not long ago and I watched a half dozen and fell in love. He's talented and funny and yet I'm almost more in love with the reactions around him. The world is scary and sad and this wriggly, sassy little performance artist makes people laugh and dance in the most un-self-conscious way. It's a gift.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015


On days when I feel low and at all kinds of loose ends, I watch me some Little Britain.
All hail Vicky Pollard:

Little Britain: Vicky Pollard on school visit by larsen42

Tuesday, August 4, 2015


I was here recently, overlooking Diablo Lake.
On my way home from a long-awaited wedding, feeling a swirl of emotion--people seen, dances danced, disagreements aired--and disliking the swirl so much I bought Tums at the next gas station stop.
Soundtrack today is Wesley Holmes' Lost in Seattle. Check the beats at about 13:50 and drop dat ass.

Sunday, July 26, 2015

chbp 2015

Every year I say this is it, no more Block Party for me. Yet, here I am again with a grimy 3-day pass bracelet and a hangover. Bands of note so far:
  • Shabazz Palaces played an eclectic set, with drumming, humming, and enough choreography and old-fashioned rhyming that I realized they could pull off whatever the hell they want whenever they want
  • Killing time at Cha cha, we sipped on Jameson's slushies and compared Grenades with Great Falls (I'm no metal head but the latter rocked it)
  • Jarv Dee and Moor Gang alum Gifted Gab delivered a fun, dancy hip hop set
  • Brothers from Another--adorable boy-band hip hop lite
  • The Fabulous Party Boys got us dancing and made me long for a sequined jumpsuit
Filed in the guess-I'm-not-cool-enough drawer, I realized Don't Talk to the Cops were part of a semi-secret show last night, a block away from CHBP and the baby-raver shenanigans that chased us away from Com Truise (booked at Vera instead of the main stage or Neumo's, WHYYYYYYYY!).